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gangstalita
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Old -in the past- @ 04-02-2003, 09:30 AM
#1

its a start to somethin that started flowin in my head this mornin...appreciate feed on it...

my life is constantly bein swallowed in tears/
stuck in this rage with my tormented fears/
struggln to survive over the years/
havin doors slammed,wit peeps holdin up there rears/
thinkin kissin ass must be my definite career/
ive done alot of bad things in the past/
often wonder if this life is goin to fast/
now its clear i wont finish first,how bout last/
im scared to feel,knowin true love isnt real/
been forced to live without any emotion/
ripped apart time after time without any devotion/
never thought about what i really wanted to say/
feelin like im always bein pushed away/
now im alone,ready to pray/
callin to god n waitin to get somethin back/
its about as pointless as smokin crack/
meaning and selfworth have always been what i lack/
lost them,knowin i just cant get them back/
im overwhelmed with this depression/
been hooked up wit another councilin session/
payem to tell me "its just another life lesson"/
sayin"im not tryin to prove anythin just stressin my point"/
but this raps about as gone as you smokin a fatass joint/
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Old 04-02-2003, 11:13 AM
#2

Hey, pretty dope!!! In parts tho, the flow was a bit dodgy in parts, but overall it was kool, and a good message, i liked it!
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gangstalita
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Old 04-02-2003, 01:17 PM
#3

thanks razz...anyone else..feed much appreciated..
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Old 04-02-2003, 02:27 PM
#4

pretty good, flow was really well and easy to read, vocab could be improved but your rymes were put nicely and it was easy to understand where you were going, keep it up
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Old 04-02-2003, 03:24 PM
#5

Genuine message... content was maintained and you didn't cram it with filler to make something rhyme... aiight flow, a little monosyllabic, but that's alright. Keep writin'...
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Old 04-02-2003, 04:13 PM
#6

thanks all about me,and ninja......you feed was very well endowed..thanks..
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