heres somethin i started workin on while in class....feedback appreciated...

Just one more night/
before I throw the first punch and start this fight/
pretty soon all these bitches are gonna see the light/
me and my crew are gonna be chasinem down the block/
gonna be carryin loaded glocks/
ready to start blastin off their cocks/
turning them into dickless men/
they` ll all be dead by the count of ten/
they become to stupid after takin that fen-fen/
they shouldve been more meticulous/
they were a bit to conspicuous/
the shit they pulled was just to ridiculous/
thinking they were royal/
they so dum,they made blunts out of aluminum-foil/
they thought they were cool by startin turmoil/
now they’ve pushed us to far/
better watch out for my car/
these bullets are gonna givem a nasty scar/
cuz this is Detroit and everyones insensitive/
when it comes to guns nowones tentative/
this place is known as 8 mile/
to the cops were criminals on trial/
even the kids got a criminal file/
so that’s why we know how to kill/
that’s how we can handle watchin blood spill/
these bitches are knew in town,so we are kings of the hill/
to us there just lame ass newbies/
and we aint gonna givem a freebie/
we gonna teach these fake thugs a lesson/
so this is gonna have to be my final confession/

Not bad, although some rhymes were way too forced..not something I like to see with monosyllabic thingumies heh. Flow was solid for most of it though, and the rhyme scheme was interesting.