from above i see myself on morgue table oded on that oxy shit
white sheet lifted incision from naval to esphogus
brain no longer able to receive oxygen
this is my death, fuck savin you from the obvious
wake up sweatin from a nightmare, but i wasnt able to acknowledge it
was it a prophetic dream or a fable from the unconsciousness
In the end we'll see like the angels of apocolypse
dont give a shit if i live, the things i need are unobtainable objects
suicide with a gun feel no pain when i pop it
except for the second where i feel the flame from the hot tip
perception fades throw shades over my optics everythings black now
state of shock,im entering remember the past how
could i let myself,mom,and dad down?
Just a drugged up fuck up that fucked sluts in bad towns
Stumblin home at dawn half gone cry whiskey tears through a sad song
im damn wrong, but in my heart i feel its right
either way i go in the dark i feel the light

Chorus
So many ways to go,cold body,tag on toe
razorblade to the throat,od,or a magnum blow
anger n hate explode knife to my wrist slice my vein up slow
this is my tribute to suicide please stay for the show


Thoughts darken in toms mind sleepin pills in the garage
carbon monoxide, started carvin when my heart died
starvin for happines in hard times, victim of deprivation
wasted away in shit slums on medication
so many silent screams feels like my head is quakin
hang myself outta desperation
join the suicide army reach my destination
rather die then spend my whole life depressed and anxious
confess the hatred in the final words that bless the pages
the stress and rage is, unbarable at times
wish my thoughts could be comparable to mimes
the voices are so loud no thoughts can be comparable to mine
im an impared fool that sees the truth but my stares are blind
and no matter how many stairs i climb fall back into the trench
Kill myself to get revenge, end this life to see my friends
this is my tribute to suicide the army extends




I wrote this in an hour or so, first rap in a loooong time, im a lil rusty.Styles a lil different..rep for feed

Join the army..Bleed all you can bleed

from above i see myself on morgue table oded on that oxy shit
white sheet lifted incision from naval to esphogus
brain no longer able to receive oxygen
this is my death, fuck savin you from the obvious
wake up sweatin from a nightmare, but i wasnt able to acknowledge it



i like this tom... i like how you got the structure down now and that your back into writin "rap" songs.. :D... good flow but i think you should work on inner rhymes.. IMO it makes it flow better and easy to read.. anyway.. when are we gonna hear you bless a track tommy???

by the summer....Thanks for the feed bro..

that shit was more poetic than usual rap songs. I liked how in some lines you made the details highly artistic; you managed to make us feel the situation easily & envisage the scenes vividly.
The flow however needs a lot of work, I don't know how Bank read this but I don't think it flowed well. you still need some work on the structure. rhymes were good, vocabs were extremely good, & the hook was prolly a stand out. I quite liked it. Very nice hook.
work more on your multies & inner rhymes....other than that, I like your style.

thanks bro, my structure is fucked imo..Im retarded when it comes to that..When i rap it it flows ok, but i can see why you say that..Thanks for the feed

from above i see myself on morgue table oded on that oxy shit
white sheet lifted incision from naval to esphogus
brain no longer able to receive oxygen
this is my death, fuck savin you from the obvious
wake up sweatin from a nightmare, but i wasnt able to acknowledge it
was it a prophetic dream or a fable from the unconsciousness
In the end we'll see like the angels of apocolypse
dont give a shit if i live, the things i need are unobtainable objects
suicide with a gun feel no pain when i pop it
except for the second where i feel the flame from the hot tip
perception fades throw shades over my optics everythings black now
state of shock,im entering remember the past how
could i let myself,mom,and dad down?
Just a drugged up fuck up that fucked sluts in bad towns
Stumblin home at dawn half gone cry whiskey tears through a sad song
im damn wrong, but in my heart i feel its right
either way i go in the dark i feel the light

Chorus
So many ways to go,cold body,tag on toe
razorblade to the throat,od,or a magnum blow
anger n hate explode knife to my wrist slice my vein up slow
this is my tribute to suicide please stay for the show


Thoughts darken in toms mind sleepin pills in the garage
carbon monoxide, started carvin when my heart died
starvin for happines in hard times, victim of deprivation
wasted away in shit slums on medication
so many silent screams feels like my head is quakin
hang myself outta desperation
join the suicide army reach my destination
rather die then spend my whole life depressed and anxious
confess the hatred in the final words that bless the pages
the stress and rage is, unbarable at times
wish my thoughts could be comparable to mimes
the voices are so loud no thoughts can be comparable to mine
im an impared fool that sees the truth but my stares are blind
and no matter how many stairs i climb fall back into the trench
Kill myself to get revenge, end this life to see my friends
this is my tribute to suicide the army extends




I wrote this in an hour or so, first rap in a loooong time, im a lil rusty.Styles a lil different..rep for feed

Join the army..Bleed all you can bleed









droppin shit n it's obvious i'm on that oxy shit
n it's stoppin the oxegen from my esophogus
fallin n shit but I can't even acknowledge it
flirtin with death n i ain't scare of an apocolypse!!
:idontknow:

thanks for murderin my whole verse with that,lol

yeah, sweet flow fa sho'

but come on, 'drugged up and f*cking sluts', what are you so sad for? LOL.

the lifestyle isnt what i want

Sick. Lotta good imagery, some ill lines. Real nice altogether.

thank you

the lifestyle isnt what i want


but thats the lifestyle i want

wow really dark and sad man nice very nice


was it a prophetic dream or a fable from the unconsciousness
In the end we'll see like the angels of apocolypse


thats was my fav line

i like the chorus the best.


i feel emo now. im uncomfortable. :( :rofl:

lol fuck you..I murder emos..Thanks for the feed

cmon now tom.... don' be commitin suicide on us.. haa

buck you

yeah i really liked this a lot...i like deep thoughtful stuff...the line about letting your mom and dad down sent a tingle down my spine....i can't be bothered to list the quotables but it was a great piece...props.

thanks man..Means a lot comin from you

uuupppiinnn

Good piece, couple of quotables, some good multies, and you said something throughout the whole thing. Very poetic with some good imagery too.

You've definately gotten better. I can see it.

thanks dude, really appreciate it

^^yo...have you got machine head's new album yet? "the blackening"..as you're a fellow metalhead...i'm highly recommending it:D

no but ill check it..Ive been waiting for machine head to be good again