the beggining...............

Perpetual darkness-harboured-noxius gasses in invisible time pockets/
Long before nature gave way to man-made-machinery, sattelites and space-rockets/
'angry' particles 'clash' to form a 'riot' of color and supersonic activity/
Spherical-movement-migrating outwards due to the imminent onset-of-gravity/
a 'seed-is-sown' from which the Nebula-explodes into light and 'blossoms'/
a manifestation of fury from the hands-of-God releasing all of his problems/
inanimate-bodies 'rain'(reign)supreme as the fires are quenched by meteor-'showers'/
Coincidental-progression shapes the feautures through process of freak-bionic-powers/
casms of liquid-fire ignite the flammable-skies as the 'landscape-paints-a-canvas'/
Fate rests in moral-hands now as we are left to make do with what God-hands-us/
immortal lungs breathe life into a barren rock-formation left to copulate/
Organisms with 'eyes wide shut' crawl to the surface and.."stop to late!"....

"what? what the fuck is this shit?..cut this poetic bullshit off man...i'ma be real....

Yo..Where the fuck is God? he's as 'present' as an 'empty-christmas-tree'/
'little' bitch, 'invisible' cuz this fag's a 'midgit' when he's standin-next-to-me/
He can see everything?' well he better get some new 'spectacles'/
Cuz this bitch-see's-shit like he be on 'shrooms' hangin wit some 'green-leprechauns'/
No wonder his 'son'(sun) left him, he's like the 'moon' in its fuckin 'new-stage'/
hiding behind the fuckin Earth gettin a hard-on everytime me and you-praise/
Thats why his fat-ass lives in a church, he gets pleasure off the steeple/
and think of how much fuckin fun he-had when he designed the parts-on-people/
why should we let one 'being' decide our lives when he dont fuckin exist/
'come together' as people cuz religeous-bullshit is more 'dull' than a solar-eclipse/
If you stop believing in this bitch, he'll make like a 'sign' and 'go-a-way'(go away)/
and people-will-get-their-say rather than killing the innocent and blowing-a-plane/
so next time you go to 'church', think, is there anything that could be 'alter'-ered?/
yeah..blow the fucking thing up, 'rejoice' and become free and uncultured/.......no beef God

you had a nice rhyme scheme and the rhymes we're good as well... good multi's.. but there's one thing that disturbs me alot nowadays. practically all textcees that are considered "good" just seem to rhyme big words but the text doesn't really mean anything. i see there's a topic to this verse, but it's really influenced by those kind of rappers that can say something about "deep tombs of slaughterstones, infested by dark minds in shadow" and claim later that it is actually about something, but others are too stupid to understand it :D

not a diss, i'm just giving you my oppinion

peace

i liekd tha rhymin and tha werd play..
didnt like tah subject even tho it was interesting 2 read your point of view..
peace

thanks for the feedback...i see what you're saying creep..it makes sense to me though(the 1st half of the verse) ive got a deep imagination and using bigger words..which i personally understand..helps me get my point across more precisely..i understand what your sayin though dawg..i mean i seen loadsa whack textcees..who type poetic bullshit and it REALLY doesnt make sense...anyway..pz.

nice.cant wait 4 ur audio :mad:

well i dont wanna sound like a dickrider, but that was good...even though i cant understand some of ur vocabulary, cuz u use some big words in it i cant be assed to look up in the dictionary lol

:o @ me being a bimbo..

and yeah, i wanna hear an audio!

YEAH!! AN AUDIO - you know that the offer is there dawg....

PZ>